Another Hate Letter

by M. A


It is such a pain in the ass facing narrow-minded people. Oh, don’t remind me how boring this writing could be. Cos yeah, I’ve already written such thing before. I have declared clearly that I loathe people who are being judgmental. They seem to enjoy criticizing or telling others what to do. I am so angry; I am so not interested to such people I want to walk out from the conversation. Man, I looked up on my phone’s dictionary a definition of ‘Broad-minded’ which says “ready to allow others to think or act as they choose without criticizing them”. And if I say I am broad-minded, it seems keeping me trapped. Because I sound like criticizing those narrow-nuts all the time. So I say, fuck it. Fuck people who think they are the ones who are right. They think right, talk right, and sound right, whatever. They all are seemed wrong to me. That is true.

And then I have to live nearby those folks. I wanna cut my throat you know. Describing how fed up I am with the idea. Truly, I get mad easily when people are being unethical. I do unethical things too, but I think I have my personal sphere to do that. And when I got out, I put things in order and I want people to do so too. And it seems hard for them, I have tried and I fail. I cannot expect any further on people who are rude, who are reckless (whatever the matter is) who are unjust, who are being fuckin prejudice. Yes I’ve lost hope on them. No more hope. I will just have to cut their heads off if they put me in my nerves. I am that mad.

See, I’m posting mad things again. I’m reading this Oscar Wilde’s novel called The Picture of Dorian Gray, and for those of you who know Sir Henry, I am so much like him. I think like him and I see life like him. I can’t even think that there is a character really fits mine. Yes, Sir Henry it is. He is so rational, realistic man. Sometimes his colleges can’t even put up with him cos he is full of negative thoughts. Well I would rather say they’re not negative words. We (Sir Henry & Me) are just people who think unsimilar to common ones. We don’t agree that much, sometimes our friends choose not to be with us if they need encouragement or other naïve point of view to be shared. We don’t do that. I’ve lost time to catch up with my old pals because I’m not into them. It is said that I’m too ‘hi-priced’ too negative. How negative I could be?? I don’t see things horribly, they do. Even a horrible things like a murder or suicide, are not my category of horror. You know what is horrible to me? It is by all means, making people suffered to death following things they do not want to follow. Yes, call me foolish, but I praise FREEDOM that much. I love peace, but I don’t see it exist. It is an expression that I’m so much pitied by the greediness that produced by human.

I often talk about human. How far human can go when they are happy, when they get mad.. I already understand them. I don’t even have a question if things happen. I know the reason. That’s why Sir Henry is my delusional friend. I hope I could alter my feelings to do something more useful than just cursing at it. By then, I will ease my feelings toward people I hate, and I be very careless to them. I have turned to be someone who has cold blood, yes that’s me. I’d rather play with my loved ones. I’d rather go reading indulging books; attend fantastic events, having decent talks and so on. And I leave those crappy people behind. Maybe for awhile.. Usually they will come to me and ask where I have been. I don’t have a good answer; I just don’t like you so I find some other people. Yes, I am self centric.

But how cannot I be? For others keep on acting rude, being naïve (yes even naivety becomes my reason not to like being with somebody), judging others for what they have chosen, whatever. I got my things with me and I will certainly be happy with my thoughts. I’m just gonna have to protest a bit, let it out, and enjoy my life. I am that happy. Don’t think that I have this ‘negative thoughts’ all the time which I call ‘being rational and realistic’, stating that I am not happy. In fact, I’m happier and more grateful than you. So, keep on being yourself and I will keep being me. If there is no understanding than bye-bye.

I have so many ideas; certain people have amused me for being themselves. They are artists, friends, seniors, acquaintances, lectures, mentors, even a stranger or random individuals. I’m so grateful of them, and people whom I loathed, they may go to their destinations and arrived.. but I bet if they keep on being naïve all day, they will owe their self BIG TIME. Whatever kind of destination we would go to. I already have mine all set and just keep on enjoying my rhyme.

So narrow-minded people, let yourself burnt to hell.

Yes, Hell is here, Honey