Unanswerable Anger

by M. A

Here I am, posting.

In the mean time, I’m staring at my keyboard very slowly. Capture letter by letter stupidly. I feel like mocking somebody a lot. What is it with me? Do I need anger management now?

I’ve known myself for almost 21 years. I am very calm, clear-minded.

The only thing which can calm me down is sleeping. Nap-taking, early night sleep, shower, eat sweets and hanging out with cute uncontrollably loud people. At the time they were shouting, yelling, laughing, I find myself pacified. Hanging awhile in a good condition. I love it being in a crowd and find me self, go silent.

I haven’t been drinking since I got sick. I have not smoked up either, nor trying cigarette. In fact, I kinda hate ciggar’s blow from folks around. Or should I lit something up tonight?


If I can’t do any kind of thing, I want to get really sweat. I want to run. Run in a large field and shout, “FUCK YOU YOU LAME LAME MONEY SEEKERS WITH BAD TONING RESULT AND COMPLETELY STUPID COMPOSITION AMATEUR SINGLE-LENSED PHOTOGRAPHERS!” (Okay. ‘That’ is what I’ve been concerned about myself, stupidity)

Or do I get jealous here?

Jealous that they have time to seek for appreciation, and flirt with mine.

I’ll lit something up then.

See you over the rainbow